The Fat Rat Pat the Cat

There are two points that are important for you to understand in this wee tale. The first is that I am not and never have been a reading teacher. My wife taught our two sons to read. The second point is that our daughter Captain Chaos is one strong willed and persistent little imp, a trait that she shares with her 40-year-old twin. We are convinced that it was her strong will and persistence that allowed her to fight through her heart defect and emerge healthy on the other side. She survived out of pure petulance.

Six years later, the Captain is the newest addition to our homeschool. Of all the subjects that I teach her each day, reading is by far the most challenging. I do not have the experience of having taught my sons, so there are times when I find myself struggling with reading instruction. My daughter, who is far smarter than she cares to allow anyone to find out, is capable of reading the beginning material in our Hooked on Phonics program. She just doesn’t want to bother working hard. It isn’t uncommon for her to throw out guesses at the letter combinations presented to her. If I show her the letters “AN,” and ask her to pronounce them, she will shout “CAT” or “FAT” or “NAP” with a wicked grin on her face. She pushes and pushes and pushes until my patience is stretched thin. I have discovered that she enjoys seeing whether or not she can make me mad enough to scold her. Only then will she settle down and read all of the words properly.

She does the same thing to her mother.

Yesterday, I sat down in front of our computer with the Captain on my lap. The day before, she read all of her words correctly on one try, without any of her usual games. Yesterday marked the return of difficult girl and her word games. After one or two wild guesses and their accompanying giggles, I flipped the girl over on my lap, gave a swat on the butt, and plopped her back into a seated position. After allowing her a few minutes to regain her composure after a cascade of shocked tears, I asked her if she was ready to try again.

“Yes,” she replied, her pouty lower lip extended.

“Good.” I put the letters “AN” on the computer monitor.

“AN,” she correctly identified.

I showed “CAN.”

“CAN,” she informed me. She quickly read through the next few screens. “FAN, MAN, RAN.” Then Captain Chaos shot me a look only an angry daughter can flash towards her father.

“There! Are you happy now?” she asked.

Six years old.

I’m happy to report that the young lass correctly read all of her remaining letters and words yesterday afternoon. It was a pleasure working with her. In fact, she read so well that I am introducing new letter combinations and words tomorrow. And there was an additional lesson my young reader learned yesterday, beyond “rat” and “cat” and “bat.” She learned that she can continue pushing buttons, but sometimes the old man pushes back.