Coffee and a Roll?

I found myself sitting in the blazing hot nine a.m. sun Saturday morning, watching the adept fielding and precision throwing of two dozen eight year olds in an instructional league baseball game. Major Havoc’s Royals were competing against the Fireballs to see which player could launch the ball into orbit while attempting to throw from the pitcher’s mound to first base. They’ve already mastered allowing a ground ball to roll between their legs and into the outfield. Watching the game was made easier by an extra large BK Joe. The Boss hit me up at the perfect time this morning with her request that I accompany our middle child to the diamond. The one cup of coffee that I had had was just enough to make me agreeable but not enough to calm the shaking. So, I stopped at Burger King on the way to the game.

Now, I don’t know who the genius was that developed the graphics for a Burger King coffee cup. Better yet, who sat on the committee that approved those graphics? Either way, while my mind wandered away from the Bill Buckner impersonations in front of me I noticed the graphics on the side of the cup. Take a look at this and tell me what the first thing is that comes to mind.

Do you see it? The Boss saw it. She saw it right away. She saw it and she helped me photoshop the first thing that came to mind. All it took was a few extra flies.

Did the brain trust at Burger King really want to tell the world what their coffee tastes like? I don’t know about you, but that sure does look like a lawn sausage to me, complete with the aroma drifting away to the neighbor’s yard during their annual family barbecue. Isn’t it always the day that you realize your yard is a month overdue for a cleaning when the cars start rolling into the neighbor’s driveway because their oldest had their eighth birthday and seven generations are arriving to attend the baptism? You step out onto your patio and place your hands on your hips as you proudly survey your property. You inhale deeply and think, “Hmm…Burger King must have brewed a fresh pot.”

The big question is, does Burger King data mine the internet for references to their products the way Home Depot does? If they do, BK will soon return to their boring white coffee cups and it will all be due to the rambling of guy, ironically, named Arby. Regardless, until the new McDonald’s and their award winning coffee comes to Apathy, Burger King will be the default coffee of choice.