Monday, August 23, 2010

In Arby’s World

I once wrote a short story about a man in an insane asylum who met a series of characters found in children’s books and television shows.

It was autobiographical.

I often find myself reading books to my children and thinking, “That would never happen if I wrote this story. In my story…”

I’m remarkably good at reading to the kids while actively daydreaming.

Today, I present to you “This is What Happens in Arby’s World.” My very first “This is What Happens in Arby’s World” presentation is:

The Very Quiet Cricket
By Eric Carle

One warm day, from a tiny egg
a little cricket was born.

Welcome! chirped a big cricket,
rubbing his wings together.
The little cricket wanted to answer,
so he rubbed his wings together.
But nothing happened. Not a sound.

Good morning! whizzed a locust,
spinning through the air.
The little cricket wanted to answer,
so he rubbed his wings together.
But nothing happened. Not a sound.

Hello! whispered a praying mantis,
scraping its huge front legs together.
The little cricket wanted to answer,
but before he could even try to rub his
wings together the praying mantis
lunged towards him, trapping the young
cricket between his forearms.

He quickly bit off the cricket’s head,
munching happily. The cricket said nothing.
Not a sound. He couldn’t.

He didn’t have a head.

Ooooo, a two-fer! croaked the frog,
catching the dining praying mantis on
his long, sticky tongue.
And he hopped away.

The End

10 comments:

TobyBo said...

perhaps fodder for a sequel: over the weekend a praying mantis drowned in our dog's waterdish. We now have a perfect specimen.

Eat, Fart and Bark said...

You have me crying, I'm laughing so hard. Stop it!
Get it published, will ya.

Brownie said...

I'd be laughing out loud but don't want to wake Red.

More! More!

Some Guy said...

Nicely done, Arby! That's sounds very much like an Eric Carle book, at least for the first two paragraphs.

You might be interested in what Beck did over at http://frogandtoadarestillfriends.blogspot.com/2009/10/because-halloween-is-coming.html
There are thirteen different stories, I think.

GingerB said...

I think you just triggered a bunch of Far Side memories for me and made me snort water out my nose. Damn you.

Becky said...

Awesome, Arby!! ~ Can't wait to hear more!

Oklahoma Granny said...

Can't wait to read your next story re-write.

S.K. said...

Ummmm..... yeah. I don't think Eric Carle would approve. Lol.

L. said...

Great story, Arby, just be careful what you do to/with frogs. Be VERY careful........ :O)

Linda said...

HAHAHA!!! I love it! I think I'll read your version to Jimmy later this morning. He's a boy. He'll like it MUCH better than the original. We had a beautiful spider web attached to our car yesterday morning. Jimmy wanted to wait outside the car while I drove out of the carport so he could "watch the spider die." (said with a fiendish grin). Yep...he'd definitely like your version.