Monday, February 8, 2010

True, Thrifty Love

Do you remember how the bathroom looked before it was remodeled?  This is how it now looks.



Of course, I swept up that little pile of stuff on the floor before the Super Bowl party started.  I also told my guests that leaving the bathroom and announcing “The toilet leaks!” was justification for the use of deadly force.

I get to go to the dentist today! Saturday morning I was munching on some pasta salad when my lower crown popped off. Pasta salad. It was cooked and everything. It just popped right off my molar (or whatever is left of it). Go figure. I’m hoping that the dentist can reset this thing, because this is my favorite crown. It is the most comfortable crown of the three that I’ve had. I only have two crowns, but one had to be replaced. I told General Mayhem to make sure that if anything ever happened to me (i.e. I die) that he should make sure to get the crowns off my teeth. They’re gold. He might as well. If he doesn’t, an undertaker will. The General adamantly refused. The Boss was much more understanding.

“Oh, don’t you worry,” she assured me. “I paid for them. I’ll get ‘em out!”

I can just see my dead carcass on the sidewalk with the Boss leaning over me, one foot on my forehead and a pair of pliers stuffed in my mouth, calling out, “Does anyone have a flashlight?”  At my funeral the guests will be asking, "Does that say Nike on his forehead?" 

That’s true, thrifty love.

14 comments:

Teacher Mommy said...

LOL...For some reason I was able to picture that, perfectly.

TobyBo said...

very obedient wife you have there. Hope you are going to make her Valentine's Day special enough that she will be in no rush to get those crowns

And, great job on the remodel! :D

twisted said...

Hey Boss, what's the easiest way for getting the crown off the tooth after it's disconnected from the human head? I've got a couple of those passed down through the ages. Family members didn't want to separate them of some reason. That sounds kinda gruesome, doesn't it.
Twisted.

Brownie said...

Yes! Keep the gold! :) And while you're at it did you know that you can have your body cremated and then at high temps your body could be made into a precious jewel? So Boss could wear you around her neck, or her finger.

The bathroom looks great. A very fine throne to go with your crowns.

This snow and cold up here in the north country is getting to me.

Yah, you betcha!

Anonymous said...

BWAHAHAHA!

You did a fabulous job on the bathroom. Make housecalls? :)

Michelle said...

Just be thankful, its not diamonds in your mouth, or you might be missing some teeth now!! hahahahha
Good job on the bathroom!

Kathleen said...

Nicely done on the bathroom!

Kid said...

Looks good Arby.

Oklahoma Granny said...

Great job on the bathroom. Hope all went well at the dentist's office.

CrossView said...

Great job, Arby!

Subvet said...

Very nice job on the bathroom.

GingerB said...

Hey, I'd be willing to use that toliet! and I have very high standards.

Opus #6 said...

I bet the toilet doesn't leak...

Big Doofus (Roger) said...

How did you manage to tie toilets and gold teeth into one blog post? I read the whole thing, too. Nicely done.